~|| S7uCk !n R3aL!tY..... ||~ W!7H nO EsC4p3...

2007-01-18T07:48:00.000-08:00

O.o

the end ~ i give up...

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人往往都选择去逃避, 而不是去面对... ...

2006-12-25T09:14:00.000-08:00

hmmm... christmas was okay bahx i gues..
heex..
received quite a no. of prez...
hahax... thanks a lot worx ppl!!
actually whatever ppl giv is okay la...
no matter the prize n such...
it's the thoughts that count marx...
=))

spent the eve of x'mas at xueni's house...
n counted down there..
den went back to mac wif kenghwee..
played some games there lo..
drank a bit of alchohol.. n exchange presents!!
nice gathering there... hehex...

den walked back to xueni's house again..
tired sehx...
but was okay afterall...
this morning the moment i reached home got to change n go out again le..
to mu gu ma's house...

liping n lihua jies gav me x'mas present worx..
surprise lehx...
didn't noe they wounld remember me..
not close to them after all..
hehex..
chatted wif liping jie...
n she was super nice n sweet...
as i was like super piggish today... =X
she offered her bed for me to slp..
hahax.. of course marx..
ppl by the nam eof liping are nice!!!!
=)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
like me... xDDD
lolx... bui paiseh sia...

=.=
went to get the prez that i left behind yesterday from wendy..
den receive prez form peggy also...
peggy like super cheerful today lehx...
wierd...
hahax...

end of story...

2006-12-21T16:41:00.000-08:00

hmmm... saw some photos n a malaysian forum kelvin showed me jus now...
which is where i got my new insights of this floods due to the rain...
didn't realise the situation is so bad in malaysia nia...
perhaps cos i don't watch the news bahx...
=xxxxx
read bout some places are w/o power n water supply...
n roads completely blocked off...
so they are like totally isolated lo...
help n food supply can't get to them...
imagine suffering in the dark n cold....
plus the hunger...
n mostly wif lots of their family overseas le...
so pitiful nia...
especially the old n the young...
read that the flood water level in some places reached till like the window on the first floor of some houses le...
quite high le ye...
think i'll find myself drifting in the water if i were to live there...
n i'll probably need a life jacket soon...
or ppl will really hav to visit me wif choc le...
haix...
so pitiful..
somehow hav this feeling that the world is ending soon...
jus anytime...
w/o warning...
so scary...

kind of glad of the sunlight previously yesterday...
at least i feel safer under the sun den in the storm....
haix...
pray that those ppl in malaysia will be safe n sound...
n get through this ordeal...
haix...
jia you!!
gambatte!!
xDDD
god bless them...

2006-12-09T08:39:00.001-08:00

hmmm... a brief on for today bahx...
ice skating was cancelled off cos nobody's coming...
so met up wif karying, wendy, wayne n siqi in je..
wayne's right leg was in a cast..
or is it left leg??
nvm... hahax...
bless him... take care worx...
xD

rot in je lo..
tried sneaking in kpool but unsuccessful..
we recorded a remix of many songs...
titled LWKS...
but the first one was better bahx i guess...
2nd was a bit messy le..
hahax...

went ginza wif wendy...
hopefully can see garfield...
but he was only working in the morning today..
sobs... so no luck lo...
nxt 2 days opening though...
hmmm...
on the bus back... saw a man came up the upper deck...
thought of Mr Chng...
den indeed...
when i went down... took a look n it was him...
hahax... shock sia... so zhun...

nice... =))

chatted on phone wif siqi for an hour at least...
in the morning...
touched on some topics...
memories came back...
suddenly felt a bit 感慨...
hahax... felt like crying lo...
talked bout garfield's leaving...
den heard from her that he told marshall..
that the reason he went off quietly was...
so as to not create too much of a dramatic reaction marx...
those 哭哭啼啼 n stuff... so that we won't be too sad...
=((( that i really cried le...
haix......................................

it would be nice if we could all have an item...
that would remind us of the f4n-7aS7!c G4n9 '06...
for christmas...
that would be nice...
=))

~能放下，能忘记，或许也是件好事，始终幸福。。。~

2006-12-08T05:31:00.000-08:00

woohooo...
xD
on wed i went back to the new sch to help mrs ng-tan wif the setting up of chem lab...
quite fun la...
but was damn tiring after a while...
hahax...
cos we had to peel off the labels, clean n wipe wif ethanol...
for around 200 over beakers...
beakers of diff sizes...
n material...
hahax...
wif cindy, ailing, waikhit, n jiarong...
den we saw some juniors slacking lo...
while we are hardworking there...
hahax..
mrs ng treated us to canadian pizza...
heex...=))

den went to naz's house wif wendy n mariah..
on the way went lot 1 also...
met mariah there marx...
crapped a lot at naz's house..
her house style sia...
so nice lo..
haix....
i wan double decker bed...
hmmm... main purpose to fix her com lo...
den eunice joined us after her dinner...
yeahheh...

den the thurs suppose to go sentosa play volley de..
den weather was super bad...
den a lot noth going liaox...
kirst was unwell... siqi not coming out... den fahmi n melor needa wait till afternoon den can come..
hahax... we were w/o ball also...
sobs...
sean was the only one who made it to habour front the meeting place..
lolx..
me n eunice waited at je for wendy...
in the end sean called...
den sort of blamed us lo...
for telling him last minute...
when we knew it last min too..
lalalax..
in the end the whole thing backfire lo...
hahax...
den we lot 1 kbox instead..
fun la... cheewei joined us too..
i was damn tired n fell aslp sometimes there..
=XXX
evening went taman to play bball...
plus a bit of volley also...
hahax..
not bad la... get to exercise a lot...
hax..

today went training...
i was late though...=XXX
miss phoon said to us all...
nxt time late mus copy 10 code of conduct...
n i was like... opps..=X
hmmm in the end i tio 5 lo...
nvm la... who ask myself to be late...=XX
met up wif wendy for lunch... wanted to catch a movie...
but didn't hav the suitable time slot...
went imm de post office also...
okay la... blisters n muscle aches...
lalalax... blissed...=))

~unknowingly, u hav hurt me through little things... till the point i could no longer trust to confide my feelings le... the me that u see is the "me" that's on show to the others de... but nvm... 人非圣贤，署能无过。。。i don't expect anything from any one anymore...~

2006-12-05T06:10:00.000-08:00

actually intended to go kbox wif xueni on sun de..
but in the end she cannot go out..
she i went to her house instead to study...
bought sushi n bubble tea for her...
nice nice...

went taman to play bball wif wendy n siqi..
b4 that got others de but they went b4 i came...
peggy actually wanted to go de but didn't..
cos she angry??

mon fahmi tuitored siqi n i on A Maths..
actually physics too la..
but didn't hav the time...
we did the tys n stuffs...
not bad la...
hahax... at jurong bowl mac..
cos it's quiet..
but i nearly lost my way there..
hahax..

wendy joined us too to study for her exam..
den we met her again at round 5 at je for movie.
yazid joined us too... but fahmi went to work le..
we watched Open Season...
both siqi n i cried...
lolx..
some parts were really touching...
think it's nicer than Happy Feet lehx to me..

saw Mr Chua at mac...
den on the way home saw him too...
n yazid actually shouted,"Hey Chua!!"
n he turned back..
arg..
hope he don't recognise me...
hahax.

today...
went for training...
tired as usual..
saw some more seniors back..
missed them a lot..
xDD
woohooo..
den went town with wendy n mariah...
actually meeting siqi for dinner..
but she didn't want to come in the end..
hahax..
so we continue walking in orchard lo..

tml going back to sch to help mrs ng-tan...
den going to watch netball match...
hahax..

~若它就这样轻易地被摧毁了，那么或许它从来就未曾如我们想象中那么顽强吧。。。嗨。。。~

2006-12-02T07:54:00.000-08:00

hmmm... yesterday went out wif chean fei...
hehex... nice day..
chatted lots bout the past times...
some funni stuffs n some incidents that happened in the past...
cool...
really missed my pri sch friends lehx...
don't really get to see them now le..
some of them are like good lo..
ion the same sch...
den quite a no. of them same bus-stop de though diff sch..
so still can see one another..
hmmm... i onli get to see a few only...
sianx lehx..
den not close wif amir also though we've been in the same class for 4 yrs le...
since pri5...
hahax..

hope will get to gather together wif lots of them some time bahx...
haix...
wishing upon the stars...
lalalax...

after that met siqi n wendy for dinner...
we ate long john...
n sat in mac to chat...
crapped a lot la...
hahax..

den today went out wif siqi n wendy aagin..
hahax..
meant to wake up at 6.30 a.m n wake them up at 7...
but i went back to slp after my alarm clock rang...
den rang aagin at 7...
but b4 i started calling them...
i fell aslp again...
till 7.40a.m bahx...
woke up n realised that siqi called b4 den..
hahax..
too piggish liaox me...
lolx..

met them at mac for breakfast lo..
wendy came abit later....
n siqi ate first cos she's punching in at 9 marx...
so wendy n i study at mac while waiting for siqi to punch out at 2p.m...
managed to complete the chinese compre...
n maths lo..
heex..
den wendy n i went to eat sushi...
while siqi wait for fahmi n alvin lo...
den 5 of us went jurong bowl to play pool....
my 2nd time playing sehx...
hehex..
not very wonderful at first la my skill..
but after that okay le..
hahax...

after siqi, fahmi n alvin left...
wendy n i played another 2 games n i played a solo one...
lolx.. that solo one was crap la..
hahax..
but good training marx...
getting all the balls in..
boring though..
lalalax..

tml doing homework also..
hehex..
hmmm...
sianx lehx...
lalalax...

lolx... realised i can be quite crazy at times when i'm sad or in a bad mood..
but sometimes i'll be very quiet...
hahax...
crap la...

~ we will drift apart n lose touch one day de... it's not easy to keep in close contact... it's onli a matter of time... this i guess, u noe it, i noe it, we all noe it... isn't it? ~

2006-11-30T06:12:00.000-08:00

hahax...
back form chalet le...
fun...

on the 27th nov, monday...
went back to sch for the sch migration thingy...
was okay la...
got to see the new sch...
walk round n all...
den after that went to li chael's house wif siqi n karying..
helped her wif the food stuffs for the chalet...
went down to buy ome more also....
realised that alvin will make a great houseman..
hahax..
he can like do everything sia..
he washed the chicken... fish...
he 'killed' (direct translation) the fish..
gorge out it's insides...
den marinated the fish n chicken wings...
he even asked li chael whether if she wans him to take in the clothes...
also washed her toilet for her sia..
wooo...
hahax..

den went JP wif peggy, siqi, yazid n wendy...
to get prizes n gifts for the games during outing..
also pass yazid the bee hoon n stuffs lo..
had fun la..
especially in the supermarket wid wendy n yazid that time...
lolx..
FUN

den nxt day youngsters outing cum chalet lo...
still FUN FUN N FUN...
spend quite some time being wet... lolx..
during games in the aqua park..
the games was crap lo...
end up everybody wet sia...
hahax...
den also had barbeque...
night walking... n stuffs...
hahax... it was very fun la...
but details i won't say much bahx..
too much to say...
think see others de blog also will hav le..
=PP

after chalet went harbour front market there to eat...
den vivo to eat desserts also..
played pool...
wooohooooo..
learned how to play..
but i was like nearly falling asleep..
hahax..
slpt less than an hour during chalet marx..
den went bugis wif wendy n kenghwee lo...
they met earlier le...
we tried the food at the teenage cafe..
was nice...
=))

haix... now had 15 moquitos bites...
en also injured my toe during outing sia..
while in the cake fight...
(celebrating the November babies)

managed to tan myself a bit...
hehex... didn't actually during the first day...
but the nxt morning while others were still asleep...
i went tanning wif fahmi n yazid...
a bit sunburn le...
lolx..
forgot to turn the other direction marx den tan too much on right shoulder...
lolx..

hmmm... today...
celebrated cindy's birthday at wcp...
met at 11a/m wif kenghwee first to get the cake...
added hershey's choc on it...
while wendy was stuck in her room...
den we went wcp first lo..
cindy arrived wif wendy at round 1p.m..
waited for a long time...
moved from outside to inside...
was so sianx...
waited n waited...
for wc to help play the birthday song..
hahax..
that was 2.57p.m...
lolx.. den the kids there so nice sia....
still sang birthday songs wif us also worx..
=))
hahax...
had the usual cake fight lo...
but i didn't get anything... hehex..
cos i can't run...
wooohoo... leg pain la..
den went je to rot n stuffs..
hahax.. met siqi n spent some time wif her after kenghwee n wendy left...
cindy left at 6 plus le...
after i bought something for my mum n sis...
n when the other two came back from pop...
when alvin punched out at 7.30p.m...
he n siqi went to eat..
den i didn't join them le...
wierd bahx i guess..
den i went walk walk myself lo..
sianx...................................................................................................................................
the end... lalalax...

~ 能够忘记的人是幸福的。。。haix... ~

2006-11-25T08:07:00.000-08:00

IN THE PAST 24 HOURS HAVE YOU...

1) Cried: yeah...
2) Worn jeans: nahx...
3) Met someone: yup, quite a number bahx...
4) Done laundry: nope...
5) Went hungry: yesh...
6) Talked on the phone: eh... yar
7) Said I love you: nahx... hahax...
8) Yourself: what bout myself?
9) Your friends: n friends??
10) Tooth fairy: no experience wif any...
11) Destiny / Fate: destiny??
12) Ghosts: nth bout it either..
13)UFO: not interested...
14) Do you ever wished you had another name?: used to but not now..
15) Do you like anyone ? now? eh... i'm 心如直水, what do u think?
16) Which one of your friends acts most like you? : non bahx..
17) When you cried the most who was there? : not sure...
18) What's the best feeling in the world? : being "loved" n be carefree plus happy...
19) What's the worst feeling in the world? : sad confused loneliness...lost... lalalax...
20) What time is it now? 11.35p.m
21) Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
22) Coke or pepsi: coke... my favourite...
23) Love or Lust: love
24) Sprite or 7-Up: sprite bahx
25) Girls or guys: girls la of course...
26) Scruff or Clean shaved: clean...
27) Movies day or night: night bahx...

THE LAST TIME YOU..

28) Took a shower: before i did this...
29) Cried: b4 this while showering lo... lolx...
30) Make you smile: jus now when wendy crapped bahx...
31) Who can make you smile no matter what: no idea...
32) Has a crush on you: would i noe?
32) Are you in love right now: 心如直水la...
33) Sit by the phone waiting for a phone call: nahx... i don't anymore...
34) Save AIM conversations: don't use that...
35) Wish you were someone else: yeah... jus like many ppl, isn't it?
36) Wish you were a member of the opposite sex: hmmm... don't think so bahx...
37) Go online for longer than eight hours: don't take note de...
38) Stucked in a lift: nvr once...
39) People you dont know and you went out with them: yeah...
40) Hate a person to the core that you wish that he/she will die immediately: no one...=))
41) Swear your parents or siblings: not for a long time le...
42) Watch comics until you cry: no comics to er watch...
43) That you saw: others n mac ppl lo... too many to list...
44) You talked to: wendy n peggy...
45) You hugged: nahx...
46) Instant messaged you: nope everyone's dead...
47) Color your hair: nxt time bahx?
48) Have tattoos: removables de lo... last time...
49) Have piercings: yeah... jus got my 6th a month ago...
50) Have on lipsticks: forgot when...
51) Own more than 10 pairs of flip flops: not once...
52) Like someone: everyday??
53) Hate someone: not sure..
54) Have any money on you: yeah... five cents??

Layer one -On the outside

Name: LiPing / Levina
Birthdate: 29th June 1991
current status: single...
Eye color: dark brown i guess...
Zodiac sign: goat

Layer two -On the inside

Your heritage: chinese... hakka born... but speak mandrin/cantonese...
Your fears: a lot...

Layer three - Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow

Your first thought when you wake up: sianx... like nth to do today...
Your most missed memory: pri sch n mac de... plus last time badminton de...

Layer four - Your Pick

Mac or KFC: both... hahax..
Single or group dates: single bahx...
Adidas or nike: both... yeah...=))
Lipton Tea or Nestea: lipton...
Cappucino or coffee: eh... not sure...

Layer Five - Do you

Smoke: nope... not when i hate it...
Curse: guess so...
Take a shower: yup yup...=.=
Have a crush: who hasn't?
Think you`ve been in love: yeah...
Like school: yeah.. hahax...
Want to get married: guess so bahx...
Believe in yourself: sometimes...
Think you`re a health freak: nahx... i eat all sorts of junks..

Layer six - In the past month

Drank alcohol: yeah...
Gone to the mall: of course...
on stage: yeah... but to play badminton though...=XX
Gone skating: YEAH
Dyed your hair: nahx...

Layer seven - Have you ever

Played a stripping game: eh nope...

Layer Eight - Getting old

Age you are hoping to get married: certainly b4 30...
I LOVE: what i love... =PP
I FEEL: sad n bored... disappointed...
I HATE: what i hate... lalalax...
I HIDE: my feelings??
I MISS: the past...
I NEED: something to make me feel bit more chong shi...

PEOPLE ARROWED. : none... i'm not evil.. hahax... ^_^

2006-11-25T06:51:00.000-08:00

hmmm... today was okay bahx i guess...
went to je to meet up wif kelly...
to find siqi to do make-up for her...
but got party marx... so we went chevrons to find her lo...
before that we went spectacles hut to get contact lens...
den take taxi there...

while siqi's doing make-up for kelly...
i helped wendy clear up the stuffs...
yeah...
den we all went back to je together by the shuttle bus...
kelly went home to prepare for the wedding dinner..
i went back store wif wendy n siqi...
rot there writing my code of conduct while waiting for wendy lo...

den crap wif her n rot together at the long table...
sean asked me to help to wrap presents for tml's party...
but in the end also nvr do anything...
lalalax... wth...
he said go eat dinner until don't noe when he finished eating...
den also nvr give me the things to do...
lolx..

nvm lo... den i finished more code of conduct...
hehex...
left half more to finish...
woohooo...

den went home le at ten...
n tml de ice-skating cancel le...
cos a lot cannot come in the end...
so no point la... gather also like no gather...
hahax... so decided to watch vcds at home..
or maybe go out buy some stuffs for the chalet lo...
sianx........

xX 当大家都离开，去寻找自己的一片天，在各自的岗位上忙碌着时，是否还记得旧时曾共同分享欢乐与悲伤的朋友呢？Xx

~人面不知何处去，桃花依旧笑春风；
那儿依然有着来来往往的人潮，那儿还是一样照常地经营着，但那儿的人却已不同了，许多陌生的脸面已取代了那些熟悉已久的面孔。。。~

2006-11-24T03:28:00.000-08:00

yesterday spent quite some time waiting...
went westmall to buy 天外飞仙 de vcd...
so i'm announced broke..
hahax..

den went back to je...
n wait wait n wait...

funni thing was... i thought i saw someone's back which looks like miss chua...
den i went up... n indeed was her..
after that i thought i saw siqi's back...
n so itwas her again...
hahax..
so qiao sia...

luckily i met siqi...
if not i'd had died of mega boredom...
hahax... she was waiting for amanda...
n we both sat in mac to wait for the two of them...
me waiting for kelly...
den saw peggy n wanted to follow her..
but when we went out...
she saw us....
n woahx...
we saw many managers..
hahax.... forgot it was patch outing day...

crap wif peggy lo both of us...
sianx la...
all 3 of us very bored sia...
hahax..
but we resumed sitting in mac when they left le...
me n siqi was talking bout waiting...
den we agreed on something...
i only remember the last part though...
"等待是痛苦的。。。" i think...

finally finally...
amanda arrived...
n soon... i was waiting alone for kelly...
arg arg arg...
hahax..
sianx lo..
actually wanted to go home de...
if siqi had not came..
hahax..
so that i can something at home den wait for kelly to come out le den i'll go...
haha.x.. nvm though..

so when she arrived we went slacking around again lo...
nth interesting le la nowadays...
met krist n went chatting n stuffs...
lalalax... nth le la...

hmmm... today wasn't a very great day bahx...
hahax... but still okay bahx...
i'm still smiling... heex... xD

arg... regretted having breakfast before training...
my stomach was aching after that...
n was having roller coaster ride while doing drills during training..
a lot of times nearly puked out...
went toilet whenever we had rest...
arg...
especially while in a set....
stomach went aching...
finished a set... the pain got worse...
plus the breathlessness...
haix...

luckily it got better...
hahax... maybe the fillet got digested le??
lolx..

hmmm... tio code of conduct...
den after talking to miss phoon...
ran off to meet chean fei...
before that met sean at store...
he was telling me bout the party this sunday...
they need ppl cos it's a mega thing...
they asked me to help...
n they gonna pay me he said....
lalalax..
see how lo...
sianx...

hmmm... so sunday we'll have to wait for those party ppl to finish the party den meet bahx...
ppl like sean, wendy... siqi??
not sure...

went vivo wif chean fei... walk walk here n there...
first stop at candy empire...
den ate at long john... hahax...
finally at 2 plus 3...
was starving to death le...
ate my breakfast at 7 plus marx...

den went walk walk again...
hmmm... found out that "levina" this name actually means a bright flash of lightning...
or one who passes at speed of comet...
n "levi" means harmonious...
though it's a guy name..
hahax..

saw it at some books in Page One, bookstore at vivo..
on the way back when we reached je...
first i saw yaihui...
den i saw eunice... lolx...
hahax...

lalalax... off to watch my vcds le...
WOOOHOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
xD

~若你重视与朋友的约会，你会让她等了又等吗？这是代表你根本就不重视吗？？ confused.... ~

2006-11-22T06:22:00.000-08:00

hmmm...
yesterday was kinda boring bahx...
until i met up wif kelvin lo...
at admiralty...
went to some kopitiam near the mrt station to hav drinks..
sobs... but in the smoking area...
=XXXXX
den i don't noe where to go...
think he knew it so stay to pei me...
den we went lot 1 de kbox...
he treated me sia...
feel kinda bad though...=(((((

hope he don't have panda eyes liaox...
heex..

went home after that to cheong homework...
did chem... nearly done le..

today... slack for a bit outside...
went bugis to walk around.. den laze at starbucks while waiting for yazid to come...
actually wanted to go vivo for movie but yesterday he checked n found no slots i think...
den change to je....
but somehow we met at bugis instead...
guess since i'm there bahx..
so we went walking round there again...
bought something at 77th street..
den we went to vivo...
lolx..
caught Material Girls at the cinema there...
not a bad show...
hahax... but yazid regretted it..
most of the ppl there at females...
lolx..

den went up to the water place there...
got into the water...
finally...
hahax... wanted to for long...
but always didn't..

took bus 97 back to je....
n slack a bit at mac...
got home round 7 to catch the new drama at channel u...
cool... not bad...
will watch tml..

bought some vcds jus now...
hahax... chatting now n gonna watch the vcds later...
heex...
but after i get my printer working again...
lolx... sobs...

well... so long....

2006-11-20T06:57:00.000-08:00

hmmm...
today was quite fun...
met at je mac at 10a.m...
with kenghwee, wendy, ngeekiang,
waikhit, yeowkheng n haocheng...
supposingly to hav breakfast...
but no one wanted anything except wendy n i...
so ended up we bought drinks onli...

den went up to take neoprints...
had to find one that can fit all 7 of us in...
lolx..
den went arcade...
while the boys went library...
hmmm... should be another way round right...
wierd...

yeah... den got peggy's call...
surprise...
but kiex la..
she asked me help talk stock from other stores...
=.=
den kiex lorx... friend yi chang i help her lo...
she gave me a ez-link card for the trip...
hahax...
that was 11.47am when i left jec...
gotta be back at je by 12.30pm...
jolynn will be joining us then...

miss my arcade game sia...
n so rush lehx..
managed to reach wcp at round 12 noon...
to take choc syrup...
lighter than expected...
cos i thought is that whole tin... sotong le me..
den take 176 to opp library n walk to ssc...
wait for the bus so long sehx...
den reach ssc at round 12.25 bahx..
took apple juice...
still got to go in take myself...
pissed...
altogether was quite heavy...
but managed to get back by round 12.35 i think...
i'm melting... by the time i reached...
hahax... peggy promised a meal...
but nvm...

den finally... we went ice skating...
eight of us..
a bit short of cash though...
=XXXX

skated till 5 bahx...
not many ppl there luckily...
hehex...
jolynn n ngee kiang managed to learn to skate... yay!!!!!!!!!!!!
xDDDD
didn't fall today...=))
luckily...
don't fancy getting my jeans wet...
hax...

some of them went home after that...
wai khit, yeow kheng, keng hwee n wendy had dinner at kfc...
i ate a choc waffle...
den met wendy n mariah for proper dinner...
before that gossip at mac lorx...
i didn't join in much bahx...
i'm not really into gossip...
don't noe how to...
lolx....

went imm for dinner..
we had burger king...
wendy bought something at cyber active n we shopped giant for a bit...
n mini toons too...
den back to je again...

tired...
hmmm... tml training...
nth much le...
sianx...

~ she cou'dn't hav not saw me... i'm right in front of her... twice le lehx... unless i'm transparent... arg...~

2006-11-19T07:53:00.000-08:00

COOL!!!
I BOUGHT SOME CLOTHES TODAY!!
YAY!!

hahax... so yeah today...
hmmm... in the morning went to ang mo kio central
wif sean n corene...
a new mac opening...
so there was some kind or event n ceremony lo..
that mac has roughly the same design was wcp...
only a bit more cramp bahx..
nice though...
ronald n friends came...
realised that big bird ain't that cute after all...
prefer its figurine..
lolx..
hmmm... saw kamsiyah...
my cher cum kaka...

remember things again...
sad...

there was even ursherer there... hahax...
wif drive-thru also...
busy like hell...
servie in...
den... pan ling ling came to the ceremony..
that commercial was loud yeah..
kiex la... quite enjoyable..

den went to orchard wif both of them...
to meet wendy there too...
went far east..
both pair separated n meet again...
time n again..
hahax...

bought all my clothes there at far east de...
a shirt n skirt accessory at bus-stop..
a tanktop n skirt at pmk...
n another shirt at a booth there..
yeah...

spent quite a lot...=XX
so..
back to "saving money" mode...
hax..

had a drink at far east bk...
realised that sean n company are at liat towers de bk...
lolx... so met them there..
went borders... ngee ann...
den to cineleisure...

walk walk along the walk lo...
hax.
dinner was improper...
eating a bit here there everywhere...
lolx...
lastly took bus to wcp...
quite some time since i last visited it...
though it's the same la...

went to feng...
at the play area...
hahax.. xD
back to tong nian ~~~

hmmm... wendy n corene hit off quite well de marx...
jealous liaox...~~~~~
hehex... jkjk..
good la...
not too wierd bahx...
better than not noeing or talking to each other yeah..
=)

hmmm...
tml ice-skating??
hahax..
wif waikhit, haocheng, yeowkheng, ngeekiang...
kenghwee, wendy n jolynn...
hmmm... kinda surprise yeowkheng go lehx...
HORX?!?!
=PPPP

~ she coudn't hav not saw me...
but she see me like 视而不见...
视若无睹de lehx... or maybe she didn't see me?!
but unbelievable la... haix... =(( ~

2006-11-18T07:52:00.000-08:00

hahax... now it's my turn to say...
I WANNA SHOP FOR CLOTHES!!!
in i mean really BUY them...
arg...
like nth to wear le...
sianx...
bought a shorts jus now...
but...
i need MORE!!
hahax...
it's always others who crave for clothes...
now it's muy turn..
lolx...

hmmm... accompany wendy to work jus now...
in orchard...
ended up she's not in the mood...
den we went to shop around...
trying to find the cineleisure...
walked the whole stretch of streets n back towards the other direction..
no cineleisure found... =XX

went far east plaza instead...
saw a number of clothes i wanna buy..
haix...
no money though..
but still i bought something...
sianx la..
hate shopping w/o the money to buy anything...
mega haix..

gonna save up some money to buy things that i want..
yeah...
jia you...xD

hmmm... evening...
she had the urge to work..
so we went back to the mrt station...
hahax...
i tried onceof her sales kind of thing la..
not bad...excited... first time marx..
but the person don't wanna buy... =(((((((((((((
haix..
but i the end... she also didn't sell any...
hahax...
kelly n krist came to join us...
amanda arrived too...
finally...
hahax...
chatted for a bit... den since everyone's hungry...
we went to EAT!!
but amanda n wendy at orchard...
krist, kelly n me back to je...

said hi to wendy punk, mariah n ppl lorx..
could see she wasn't so happy...
haix...
but it's not like i can help either...
hahax... loss of what to do le...
sianx....
sat at outside lobby of mac...
as we had pasa malam food...
unauthorized food sehx...
bought drinks from mac...
sean came out to chat wif us...
nth much la..

talked bout that mac outing...
we feel it's kinda wierd la...
for us.. ex-crew..
to be there...
i don't wanna get suan pls..
hahax..
hope it'll go along well..
n pls someone don't spoil my mood by suaning me worx..
haix...
now things diff le...
quite a few fantastic gang ppl not going...
it'll not be like june de chalet le..
won't be as fun...
some ppl who can really feng won't be going...
haix...
i couldn't stay overnight then..
now i could n a lot aren't...
sobs...
but hopefully it'll be a great one yeah??
at least enjoyable la horx??
hahax...

hahax... complete bio homework le..
kinda pls la...
we did the homework before we went to have fun...
later gonna start on chinese compre bahx...
tml maths..
jia you..=))
quite nice la doing homework...
heex...=))

~ i guess i'll still keep on trying... i won't give up yet... not jus yet... hope it'll turn out to be fruitful... ~

2006-11-17T05:51:00.000-08:00

hmmm...
finally can say hols start le!!
YAY!!!
but still quite a fair bit of homework la...
hahax... sianx...

morning went to eat breakfats b4 going to sch...
kelvin promised to make breakfast for me...
woahx...
but saw that he was busy den didn't ask from him le... =.=
hahax.. nvm nxt time bahx..
n he said something real sweet...
=)))

kind of like very long nvr hav ppl keep their promise le... especially friends bahx...
cos think i also nvr go make any wif them bahx perhaps...
kind of sweet to experience this feeling a promise kept...
hahax... so was in spirit whole day long... hahax..
xD

yeah so... happy lorx..
hmmm... had training today...
kind of tired from it now....
enjoy quite a lot though...
but still i nvr like the drills...hahax...
now preparing for tournament coming jan '07...
so moretime spent on playing matches... fun..

looking forward to next training...
it's very early though...
grrr...
also looking forward to the final n last time....
after such a long time of being deprived of using sch hall...
we'll be using the sch hall for taining...
n other sessions will be in the new sch hall..
cool...=))

i realise there are homework for all the 9 subjects...
arg...
haix..
so much of a hol...

nxt mon having pyjamas party at ting's house...
not sure if i'm going...
hahax...
wouldn't it be wierd to wear pyjamas all the way there??
hmmm... malu lehx.
hmmm... am i going to waer strawberry shortcake there??
lolx...

gonna slp early tonight....if it's considered early..

a bit sad when mrs yeo said her sad sad story..
hahax..
hope she'll continue to be our teacher nxt yr...
the same for every subject...
hahax... though there are really bad times wif the chers...
but still...
WE LOVE OUR TEACHERS!!!

xDDDDDD

~ now i finally understand what's 雨过天晴 le... crying really makes you feel better... hahax...~

2006-11-15T07:20:00.000-08:00

dots... hmm... sianx lehx...

let bygones be bygones bahx..
if things really can't change...
den jus let nature takes it's own course bahx...
lolx... i'm like trying to make myself not take things to heart anymore...
hahax... don't care whatever that's happening le...
whatever has happen lo...
why bother fretting over it liaox..
n make myself unhappy...
let whoever is here n whoever's not be it lo...
lolx...

haix... cannot lehx...
cannot jus give up on friendships jus like that bahx..
if not the opposing ppl will penetrate more easily...
so we mus unite together...
or crumble from within... =))
hope i'm not trying to convince myself bahx...hahax...
let it be true i suppose...

bonds break n forming new bonds...
tension's formed...
so we mus together unite to vanquish the evil...
or be destroyed by them...

haix.. come on lorx...
we don't specialise in friend snatching...
hahax... so don't come crapping to us that we'd whosoever...
lolx... a bit out of topic horx suddenly change to tis...
nvm... jus had a convers... wif kh bout some ppl la...
so no worries..
i haven gone crazy...

~ arg... hope i'm not influenced by peggy's way of thinking that sometimes friendships are nth...
hahax... i'm not... xD luckily... at least i can feel that i'm not... lolx... lame... ~

~ i don't wanna to be faking in front of ppl... i don't... but it seems like sometimes that's the best solution to hiding your feelings... ~

2006-11-15T04:49:00.000-08:00

hmmm.. let's see what's up for today...
normal... nth exciting...
hahax... had kfc lunch...
wif kenghwee, wendy n jolynn...
had the buddy meal wif kh... =))
n also a gossip session... woahx...
gossip, yes...
that's what we did...
lao chu lots of info sehx...
lolx...

den we went library to do homework...
but i left earlier...
don't really like soft table lehx...
sianx...
can't work in the library for long w/o my jacket...
i won't be able to write after a while...
hahax.. so went to find somewhere w/o air-con...
=))

bought the remaining textbooks... den home...
n out again wif library books to return...
nth much la...
hmmm... n i bought i storybook...
one that i saw wif kh in pop the day before... was it??
yeah... that's that..
=))

wadeva... try being in this position n see how you'll feel...
i can't be siding you in front of u n siding themin front of them...
i don't wanna be a hypocrite...
i don't...

even if i tell you i went out wif her..
what would u say...
i remember u once said 'why tell me... do you think i care'
even now i tell you u also deny noeing them...
den what do you want me to do...
to tell you or to not, exactly...

n u sure i didn't side wif u once ever...
i could still remember scolding them wif u...
i don't always think what they did was right
n i don't always like what they did...

n for your infomation...
regarding the most recent issue...
i was seriously glaring right at her when they touched on it...
since when did i side wif them all the time...
n i remembered last time that fries incident...
i backed you up against her...
yeah... so much of that i've always been siding them...
how disappointing... so all those are nth i see...
hmmm... but if u really think so den be it lo...
i'm washing my hands of things le...
nth to say le...

all i can say is that...
all along i've be trueful to you...
n i noe you've been too... n i noe that was out of concern...
that's why i didn't bring it up again till you say something somewhere...
even though we've quarrelled many times...
n we've both got our shortcomings...
but whatever i've done n things that've i've given you...
were all from my heart...
like i said...
i don't do things if i hav no feelings for it..
even though things may hapen everytime...
for me some feelings won't change so easily...
perhaps... when the time when i walk out of it...

hmmm... that outing coming soon le...
lolx.. actually i'm scared to go...
i feel so out...
haix... when i can finally stay overnight...
those ppl close to me won't be...
n i can't really bring myself to enjoy there lo...
when kelly is not going...
arg... i feel bad actually...
haix... wth la..
things were fine n thought of alright...
before the foul news came... her 恶号...
crap can... it's youngster's outing lorx... not xxx's outing...grrr...
she always spoils things for everyone...
so what if she's the boss...
n this is not the 1st time le...
irritating la...
always imposes her authority over things...
wth...
like it would kill her to have more ppl lorx...
nobody ask her to stare at them 24/7...
haix...
n don't noe how she set schedule de..
nvr ask who wans to go...
damn lorx...
kelvin's not going... ( i'll miss you de bestfriend...=X )
eh is sean going??
lolx.. haix...

is it always that when things happen... everything bad jus comes flowing out... but nvr the good...
hahax... perhaps that's human nature bahx...
i saw other ppl quarrel also like this de...
hmmm...

~ things still seems to be in her control when we are already out of the way... haix... ~

2006-11-14T08:36:00.000-08:00

ARG... I WANNA CHANGE BLOGSKIN... ... GRR... ... THIS CURRENT ONE IS SO DAMN SICKENING... =.=

lolx... time for crapping....

you put through a dilemma once..,
n u again u put me through this stupid thing...
have u ever thoguht bout how i;d feel?? then... n now??

during that period i'm the one suffering n hearing all those snide remarks but i can't do anything at all...
n now... a long-termed prejudice of yours against them...
u noe them n u noe it...
yet you pretended that u don't...
even for fish's case also...
i'm not jus any block of stone u noe... i have feelings too de...
somemore i noe them...
when u criticise them in front of me... i don't feel too good...
jus the same as when they make sarcastic remarks of u in front of me...
it's jus the same u see... ...
how would u feel if someone talks bad bout your friend in your face??
not a good feeling eh?!

sometimes... a question is asked... not to seek for an opinion...
but for support n encouragement...
to boost confidence...
of course by giving an opinion opp to what's expected doesn't make u wrong la no offence...
but it's jus not what's wanted... get it...
soemtimes a friend's little little encouragement can really do wonders...
can really bring a man from mortal peril...
to becoming a successful man now... like Tommy Dorsey...

lolx... it doesn't help wif u contradicting all that you've said...
wif one... follow your heart...
n the rest objecting to that...
like what the heck??

things change... not onli cos of once matter...
it's a build-up of many things from past till now...
even stuffs that we thought have been settle n peaced...
when thing's happen...
everything jus plonks in...
if the situation has always been good...
den jus this small incident won't do much as a tiny fracture to the whole picture...
it won't jus break apart...
yeah... amen??

hahax... kiex... enough of these craps...
hmmm... life's been okay so far i guess...
troubles are part of life... so no point grumbling over them... hahax...
so yeah... jus looking forward to some outings wif friends the coming hols...
finally...hahax...
3 wks extended lessons' coming to an end!!... WOOOOHOOOOOO!! xD
cheers...=))

hmmm... christmas' coming round soon...haven't done too much as a browsing through shops for christams prezzies...
fret not though... since now there's time... hehex...=))
unlike last yr's christmas... hahax...

i mus remember to check my schedule worx...
for some day to hang out wif cf...
before she kills me... hahax...=X

~ what's inevitable will come... no matter how much u've tried to prevent it...
sometimes... it's jus fate... ~

what can i do except sighing...

2006-04-25T07:00:00.000-07:00

haix... wayne's leaving le... soon.. so are ah hong and miss chan... sad... hopefully can have a farewell party for wayne bahx... just don't end up in crying fits can le... hahax... like i will... yeah... ah hong and miss chan we've got something for them le... heex... all the best to all. bahx...

parting proves to be hard to stay in contact... like the same as before... it' true... it's true... sigh~

mid-yr jsut round the corner... stress... must do well... it's so the important... to me in many ways... at least first of all to stay in mac... yeah...

though i know it's important... but still it's so damn tiring... so oooo tiring... i might just give up and not study le la... haix... i'm not strong... i'm not... i just wonder if i'll survive this... well... with flying colours...

just can't settle down... don't feel like doing anything... sianx...

thinking back... time seems to have change a lot of things... really... some time ago...things would be better... or is it better now?? hmmm... but some time ago... i would still be having chinese remedial yeah... and now i'm out... just a snap of the finger...some time ago... i'll still be a passionate badmnton player... with nothing to fight and share my passion with... some time ago... i won't be in school till 7... won't be sleeping at 2 plus a.m everyday and even 4...some time ago... i'm just an innocent kiid without any idea how "disappointment" is like... some time ago... going to mac and seeing the ppl there... won't be of any feelings to me... mac is just like a place i've been to lots of times... and i'll be just like any ordinary customer... ...

yet some time ago... i won't be having the fun like i'm having now in mac... i won't know all the peeps i've known... won't know bout some food stuffs and skills.. won't have a place called my "home" other than home and school... i won't even know how to tolerate others like now... haix...

worried bout higher chinese exam now... really scared.. what if i can't finish it again...
haix...

~~

OnC3 aG4iN...___~~

2006-04-22T09:46:00.000-07:00

hmm... once again.. realise no matter how hard i try... i'll always be the second best...no matter how hard i try... it's just never enough... i'll just never be a good friends... no matter what... i've tried really.. but still... i'm time and agin being 否定... haix... i'll never be a good MACer... a good student... at least not anymore... a good sister... a good daughter... a good Badminton Player...

ppl said i've changed... i know it too... i felt it... but why?? for the better or worse? i don;t know it myself anymore... i don't seem to know anything anymore... this is really painful to carry on & i'm not strong enough... i guess... i'm not strong at all... at time i may seem not to care... but acutally i do.... i realised... haix... maybe i'm too emotional... maybe... but that's me..

i hate this me... i hate it... i hate this torture... God... could you just release me from this pain...?? i hate having to drag myself... havng to force myself...just for the sake of doing so... even if i do something for someone... no one cares... i drag myself to recess when i could have use that time to sleep... what for... ending up having a headache... what for..

haix... i'm foolish... i realised... for having wild thoughts... thinking that... if i just try hear... one day... i'll be appreciated.. one day... things will be perfect... be wonderful... how dumb... things will never be perfect... at least not for me... for i'm destined to be a failure... destined to screw up everything in the end...

_____________ hopeless...

`haix... LIFE... is tiring...~~

2006-04-21T09:31:00.000-07:00

Haix... i shouldn't have even gone for the group study larx... or maybe it can be counted as i din go bahx... what for 自讨苦吃... rushing through Chem stuiffs... crapping to Latimar that i din bring the work when in fact i din do... somemore walked in the rain and wasted my money on taxi to reach earlier... why did i do that for?? i could have just gone back home & sleep la...it's pointless... useless... doing all these for what?? for someone... arg... forget it... wateva for...

Oh well... in the first place, she knew i'm like crying... but she left just like that... okay... it's alright... i never expect anyone to care anyway...

Worse... went tofind her at ILI class... w/o any food & was dead hungry can... but aftre that she din even pei me go eat sth decent other than sweets... Thanks Wayne for accompanying me...=)

She left saying to be back at 6 or 6+... but she never did...sms her le... so long than reply...either she expect me to be sitting there waiting for nth bt her sms to stand balancing my books on my head and smslo...

Went walking from lvl 1 to 4 in search for her w/o any clue where she was... + carrying my mountain of books... aching le leh...

Met them le... might as well don't... didn't go there for somebody else de la... i'm like existing as a non-existant... please la... she shouldn't have even ask me to go la... haix... maybe it's my fault la... if i had chose not to go... things would have been better... what for... getting myself affected... upsetted... agitated... for i'm too emotional le... they all said so...

Why must i be so troublesome la...creating problems for myself by caring when i said i will never ever again... why can't i stop being a irritating fool and burry myself in my homework and books... why am i i such a busybody... so meddlesome... care about others when my world's turning upside down...

i'm like screwing up everything in my world, losing lots of stuff that were once dear to me... yet care about others...oh please la... get a life man...

Why can't i just be a little moe heartless?? why can't i just void myself of all emotions?? why can't i just isolate myself from this world??why can't i just be dead... like i should have if there wasn't a communication error... i should have been dead... anyway... whether i'm alive or not... the earth still rotates... and ppl still live on... who would care??

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

why is it that no matter how hard i try, i can never be the best... i'm always second to others... no matter how hard i try... no one can ever see how hard i'm trying... no one understands how i feel even though they say they do... why am i always a failure... in everything i do...why? i've been trying le.. why do things still turn out this way?? why am i screwing things up... everything single thing... why are all my lovelies taken away bit by bit from me?? i'm lost... i don't know where my heart is ... i feel dead... i'm tired of the nights of crying myself to sleep... i don't see the meaning of life anymore... i hate reality... i guess i agree with yan... "death's beautiful..."

` If you can't bring my hope... bring me death instead...~

Is ThErE a Way Out>>''

2006-02-03T05:36:00.000-08:00

haiz... this is serious seh...
i pissed my teacher off liao..
sad la...
but i really not in the mood ma...
i never show black face to her lor...
my face was expressionless de...
but nevermind ba...
at least she won't be disappointed in the future le...

haiz........................................................................
to go or not...
can't find replacement le...
don't go either will also be dead la...

really wanna go "ai bu pa" again with fantastic gang again...
to let off some steam... haiz............................

forget it... feeling really lousy now...

don't like this blogskin seriously...
wanna make one of my own...
buut do i have the time???
no...
fine... stop self-entertaining myself le la...
see ya...

<--- SaY h! 7o R3aLi7y... --->

2006-02-01T04:05:00.000-08:00

hmmm... haven't been blogging for quite a while le... and now i'm back... yeah...

her mum called on sunday... surprised me a great deal...
i realise i still miss her ba... since she left on the 4th of jan...
i cried once again after that phone call... oh well... i'm too emotional ya...
perhaps i still need time to get use to...
i don't like this separation... yeah... i know she'll be back...
but still... haiz... it's the memories... it's hard to forget...
that's just reality... isn't it?
there are so many things in life we just can't control...
no matter how we'd like to... there's.... no choice...

wonder how he's(hers) getting on... hope he won't be too sad now that she's left...
sometimes i think they shouldn't have started since she know she's leaving...
ended up both hurt...
perhaps i'm not in the position to comment about this ba... but that's how i feel ya...

that phone call left me feeling sad for that day... lolx... fancy that for the new year...

i've finally got the chance to learn kiosk le wor... hahax... =D
that day i work super short hours la... lol lor... like only three hours plus...
but nevermind.. i went to kbox with keng hwee...
lacey actually going one... but in the end she bang seh us...
SOBS...
wayne... too didn't go after all...
in the end... we didn't have enough money... hahax... so paiseh... short of 40cents...
went "home" to get help... tee hee... marshall lent that pathetic 40cents to us...
WOAH...
so great yeah... =P

i saw him that day too...
CRAP...
didn't expect that too...
wonder how's he's problem is now...
no matter what... that full-stop is not put down yet...
things... have not ended yet...
i know he just didn't want to hurt me... ...

sorry guys... for this long entry sia...

alright... cny visiting is boring man... though i enjoy the reunion... but somehow... the adults are having there fun... but me... was just there... doing nothing... merely there for the sake of being there... lolx... sigh..."-"

intended to watch movie on monday.. in the end... siqi could'nt make it...
went on my own... but missed the showtime... lolx...
end up spending time at the kiosk lor... helping to pakage the breakfast thingy...
and wipe trays... ahhax...that was fun la...
had lunch with marshall...
but before we could eat... she had a little talking to with me...
arg... regret that lunch... still must kana scolding first then can eat...
nevermind la... she treated me... tee heex... =)

tuesday finally got to watch a movie liao...
i ask quite a few number of people... but only two turn up...
SOBS!!!!!!!
nevermind... it was nevertheless fun... hex...
we had breakfast at "home" then watch the 11.30a.m show...
I NoT sTuPiD tOo...
WOAH... quite a nice show eh...
made me cry... haiz...
the show's very touching...
but according to my definition of touchingness...
as long as can make me cry is called touching le...
hahax... =X

went to arcade after that...
sigh... haven't been there for quite a while le...
miss the games there...
and have become strangers to them le...
want to have a go again.. sometime... not during weekdays...
perhaps before or after work during saturday and sunday bax...
hmm... perhaps i'll go rollerblading at east coast before work on sunday...

feeling abit scared of the upcoming nsrs...
hope i won't be the first to fail lobby ba... haha...

wanna learn kayaking soon... with hamsater freddy...
woah... then i'll be tanner liao... heex...
haha... must go piah homework liao...
so long... ... ... =P

*~|| ____ S7uCk !n R3aL!tY..... ____ ||~* W!7H nO EsC4p3...

what can i do except sighing...

OnC3 aG4iN...___~~

`haix... LIFE... is tiring...~~

Is ThErE a Way Out>>''

<--- SaY h! 7o R3aLi7y... --->

~|| S7uCk !n R3aL!tY..... ||~ W!7H nO EsC4p3...